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I officially became a Mormon in 1961, when the Old Man raised his hand, said some words and shoved me under water in a Zaragoza,... [Read More]
I'm an ex-cop, taxpayer, father, grandfather, a compliant husband, writer, a churchgoing Mormon and — believe it or not — a regular user of marijuana.... [Read More]
On Thursday evening, after an exhausting journey, we arrived home from our annual family vacation to Bear Lake. Pulling into the driveway, I opened the... [Read More]
Robert Kirby is on vacation. This is a reprint of a previous column, but we're convinced the premise still applies today. Hi. My name is... [Read More]
Robert Kirby is on vacation. Honestly, it's hard to tell the difference from when he's working. Anyway, this is a reprint of a 2006 column.... [Read More]
Although I nearly went insane a few times, I don't regret serving a two-year Mormon mission. It did me a lot of good, although not... [Read More]
The recent rescue of a 13-year-old Utah Boy Scout, lost for nearly two days in the Wyoming wilderness, comes as a relief. Not everyone who... [Read More]
Few words strike fear into the hearts of longtime married couples like the phrase "family vacation." In terms of terrors, it ranks right up there... [Read More]
Back when we lived in Utah County, my wife and I were herding our young daughters into church one Sunday when something horrible happened. It... [Read More]
For the record, I have never intentionally shot another person. Not with a gun larger than .22-caliber. However, I've accidentally shot other people with lots... [Read More]
A couple of days ago, while checking out at a grocery store, I struck up a dangerous conversation with the clerk. Note: Any conversation between... [Read More]
Mormons currently attend church for three hours every Sunday. This doesn't count our holy "holidays" like stake and General Conference, when the meeting time shrinks... [Read More]
After I narrowly missed being nominated to the U.S. Supreme Court by President Donald Trump, it's doubtful that he would pick me to be the... [Read More]
When I was a cop, I wasn't always a good one. I was officially disciplined a grand total of … well, I can't remember. This... [Read More]
Sometime during my years as a cop, I arrested four BYU students — two guys, two girls — for scampering around a city graveyard in... [Read More]
Now that we have more or less settled into the last place we will ever own, there's come a need to exchange various interests with... [Read More]
Now that the new nominee for the U.S. Supreme Court has been announced, I guess it's OK to let you know that I was in... [Read More]
The LDS Church has announced a pending change in its official hymn book, quaintly known among some Mormons as "the Green Thumper." We call it... [Read More]
For Independence Day, my wife and I sheltered two spies from a foreign country currently on the verge of a deadly conflict with America. Being... [Read More]
Despite a pathological attachment to things that explode, I have placed a one-month moratorium on blowing [stuff] up. I can't stop other people from doing... [Read More]